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Inside Collection: Le Petit Journal des Refusées
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A is for Art of this age-end variety;
We Decadants simply can’t get a satiety.
B is for Beardsley, the idol supreme,
Whose drawings are not half so bad as they seem.
C is for Chap-Book, the pater familias
Of magazines started by many a silly ass.
D is for Darn it—it’s awfully shocking
Your Dekel-edge Hosiery, Mistress
Blue stocking.
E is for Editor; what does it mean?
Everyone now runs his own magazine.
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F is for Freak: see the great exposition
Of freak magazines—6 and 10 cents admission.
G is for Goup: I would much rather be
A nice Purple Cow than a G-O-U-P.
H is for Humbug, attempts to be Horrid!
(See Mlle. New York, she’s decidedly torrid.)
I am an Idiot, awful result
Of reading the rot of the Yellow Book cult
J is for JENSON, the TYPE of the day,
Some people can’t read any other, they say.
K is for Kimball, assistant of Stone;
I wonder how he will get on all alone.
L is for Lark, and the fellows who planned it. Say even they cannot but half understand it!
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M is for Magazines recklessly recent;
I know of but one that is anyway decent.
N stands for Nothing; I wish it had stood for
A little bit more than the fly-Leaf was good for.
O’s for Oblivion—ultimate fate
Of most of the magazines published of late
P is for Poster; the best one, by far,
Is the one that was made for our own P.J.R. (Price 4 bits.)
Q is for Quarrel; Harte, Hubbard and Taber,
To run the Philistine, each other belabor
R is for Rubbish; are you looking for some?
Just open the Bauble and put down your thumb.
S is for Stevie Crane, infant precocious,
Who has written some Lines that are simply ferocious.
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T is for Thomas B. Mosher of Maine,
Whose dinkey toy prefaces give me a pain.
U is for Useless and far beneath notice;
But I don’t want to say all of that of the Lotus.
V is for Versification and Verse;
We thought Chips was bad, but the Olio’s worse.
W’s for Woman, whom editors humor;
In the new field of letters, perennial bloomer.
X is for Something Unknown—let us say
How in the world do these magazines pay?
Y is for Young, and I marveled to learn
That fifty’s the average age of Les Jeunes.
Z is for Zounds! what unspeakable deco-
Rativeness Bradley has furnished for Echo.
Anne Southhampton Bliss
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This work is licensed by Johanna Drucker under a Creative Commons Attribution License (CC-BY 3.0), and is an Open Educational Resource.
Last edited by Ben Allen on Jun 29, 2009 2:59 pm -0500.
